by the bright shining light of the moon

 

oh, wisconsin.  how do you do what you do to me? 

 

as many of you probably know, i was in madison and appleton for a very brief stay this weekend.  i have recently been quoted as saying that i really love and miss wisconsin, but only in the summer.  turns out...that's not quite true... 

 

as soon as i got on the beltline, my heart felt different.  i drove past fish hatchery road and todd drive and was flooded with memories.  the places and faces and tastes of madison...there aren't enough words.  i got to see dan and holly.  i ate pho.  i played ultimate.  i got adjusted by chad, the best chiropractor in the freaking world. 

 

although it was butt cold, the weather was relatively cooperative and not much worse than indiana.

 

...and cheese.  OH, THE GLORIOUS CHEESES OF WISCONSIN!  it's something you just can't understand unless you have lived there.  when it comes to cheese, every other state is terrible.

 

and oh yeah, there was that great heart time with mj and jb.  nbd.  lots of giggling, quoting, and eating. 

 

considering i moved to wisconsin seven years ago on a pretty much just a whim, that state grabbed hold of my heart and refuses to let go, no matter how long i am away.

 

it's a terrible, good ache.  just think how bad it would be had i gone to a brewers game or the farmer's market or the farm...

less profound

i feel a certain sense of pressure to write something awesome since my last post got an insane amount of traffic.  (let's be real...insane for me.  normal posts get about 20 views.  the momma post got 300.  what.)

but after a weekend of moving and trying to adjust to a new place and a new drive, i don't have profound thoughts.  i barely have any thoughts at all.

our apartment is cute.  it's nowhere near being finished.  and both of us are leaving for the weekend, so it's remaining a bit incomplete.  oy.  but the move went well.  aside from the washer flooding...that was kind of gross.  many people helped us, and they are wonderful.  even kim, who went to the wrong apartment and carried a box in for strangers.  who were actually moving out.  haha.

i've been pulling out clothes and cds and books (ok, not yet on the books.  but it will happen.) for donations, so the 'donate 31 items' will be done in a heartbeat.

the only other list item of note is that i 'helped' heather with her scavenger hunt.  essentially, i sat on a bench, yelled at high school girls to run faster, and drove home.  now that's what i call qt with the big sis.

and...i am headed to the wisco tomorrow after work to play with mj and jb.  yes, the one and only time my little booty is getting to the great state this entire calendar year.  depressing.  but spending great heart time with my girls.

and...as soon as the apt gets whipped into shape, i'll delight you with some pics.  deuces, everybody.

my last will and testament...just in case?

in one week, i will be eating chicken. BOOYAH. 5 years of suffering, finally at an end. i am focusing on the positive (eating wings again) rather than the potential negatives (not being able to eat for a week...dying...living and still not being able to eat chicken...).

but a certain hockey player in the great state of wisconsin thinks i should prepare a will just in case. and...she also claimed all my books and movies.

so...who wants my stuff if i kick it?

faith and school: the finish line is in sight

i have one paper left. it's nearly done. and then my first year of grad school is over. WHAT?! that's just crazy talk.

a year ago, i had just finished taking the gre and hadn't even officially applied to iwu. i was still in wisconsin. and now i live in marion, indiana. HA.

this has been a RIDICULOUS year. in the best sense of the word, of course. i couldn't possibly explain all the amazing things that have happened. as crazy and stressful as my life can be, i am totally in love with where God has me.

i thrive on the things i am learning--and yes, i realize i am an uber-nerd--and i cannot get over how sweet it is to see the real-life application right in front of me. i love being around and working with college students. they make me laugh, and they give me life. i knew that before i left wisconsin, but i get to be so intentional and so real with my students at indiana wesleyan. very, very awesome.

after one year of grad school, i am not only still here, but i am more fully alive than ever before. if anyone has been worrying about this decision, i am giving you permission to stop.

i'm where i'm supposed to be.

brain vomit

i'm in vacation mode, so you aren't going to get a pre-planned blog post today. you're just going to get a random smattering of thoughts about my time in wisconsin thus far. feel free to stop reading now if that concerns you.

it's 9:45 in the morning here in wisco. and i am exhausted. so while these are fairly unstructured thoughts, you're getting them even more filter-free than usual.

*because i love wisconsin and its beautiful people, i planned a week full of breakfast, lunch, dinner, and coffee dates. literally at least 3 scheduled events with people every day. as i may have mentioned anywhere from one to a thousand times, i am an introvert and get tired out by people. so this might have been a disastrous plan...as evidenced by the exhaustion i am currently experiencing. when jennifer heard my schedule for the week, she looked at me like i was a crazy person. she might be right.

*it's a little strange how people keep telling me nothing has changed here...my world is completely different than it was 7 months ago.

*many people in madison do not understand how my faith--my love affair with Jesus--shapes my decisions and life choices. the concept of not drinking for a season of life because that is part of the culture of the community in which i am now invested is too foreign for them to wrap their brains around. part of that is because alcohol is such a big part of the culture here (and not always in negative ways). but i think it's more because their view of life is so different from mine. and always has been, honestly...it's just more apparent now because of where i am and what i am doing vocationally.

*i am thankful that there are people who know and love me. like...really know me. and really love me in spite of...and in the midst of...really knowing me.

devotional thought: home

in my 28.5 years of life on this planet, 25 of those have been spent in one part of indiana or another. it's where i grew up, where i went to school, and where i currently live. i can (and do) call it home.

but i spent a kind of random 3.5 years in madison, wisconsin. it took me a full year before i really liked the change. i'm not really sure how much longer it took before it felt like home. but it did eventually, and then it grabbed hold of my heart in a truly unexpected way.

i moved back to indiana for grad school, and leaving wisconsin felt much harder than i expected. i hadn't really missed indiana when i left it--there were moments when i missed the familiarity, and my family all lived there, but leaving the hoosier state was nothing like being away from wisconsin has been.

i miss wisconsin--especially madison--and all the people in it. every. single. day. it doesn't matter what i am doing; things relate to wisconsin. random people on the street remind me of my friends in wisconsin. it's super weird.

i was aware that i missed wisconsin, but i didn't know the extent until i started making plans to be here for spring break. driving up here felt magical and wonderful.

i was driving home.

***

it's a very good thing i am so madly in love with what i am doing (in life, in indiana) right now, or this could be an emotionally devastating time.

as it is, it just feels nice to be home.

***

where do you call home?

picture this: just one of those kids in wisconsin i happen to love...

i am making no promises about the frequency or quality of my posts over the next week. wisconsin and its residents can be quite distracting.

but anyway...this is jb and me before we went ice skating. but then we didn't actually go skating. we're tricky like that.

a list, wisconsin style

w: wisco weekend. heather and i drove up friday night and hung out in madtown. it was good and loud and random. we spent saturday and sunday in milwaukee with stephanie and miranda. yay! we also saw cousin katie. double yay!

i: i wrote a new poem today in class. it's called 'puzzle pieces,' and it's over on the side of my blog.

s: somebody awesome did all the driving (and in crappy weather) so that somebody else could do her homework in the car.

c: cheese, grilled. thank you, stephanie. magical, as always.

o: on our trip north, we made a list of 300 things for heather to do in her 30's. haha. i am obsessed with lists. i'll admit it.

n: not many things are funnier than hyperactive irish people. although...

s: skinny dipping in a bowl of whale's milk might come close.

i: i miss wisconsin. bunches and heaps.

n: november is practically over. how did that happen?

ok, i got tired after o. you're lucky i finished the list.